Wow, I haven't made a journal in forever!!! But with my life and all this shit that's been going down lately. . . I just haven't had the time. So it's time to update the world of people I don't no on my life and the various happenings in it.

So April/May. . . Probably the craziest part of my life so far. . . After our break up and little meeting that following Saturday we decided that to screw what was natural and never gave each other the space we needed. . . Meaning we've still been hanging out every week since we broke up. . . Well until this Friday. I think I've decided that I need a little time away from him because every time I go over to his place I just end up getting upset and we have to have "talks" and it's going to destroy us if I keep doing it, so I told him that I think I've been seeing him out of habit, and not really because I want to see him which is probably why I end up getting upset, so I told him we can still hang out but maybe only when I feel like I want to see him, and not just see him because I feel like I should. Still great friends, and I have such an amazing time with him, but if I keep going over there when I don't really want to I'm just going to destroy what we have.

Well that is the least of my problems, but the one I'm focusing on the most. What else has happened you ask? Well my daddy might have cancer, my grandma was in the hospital, and my financial aid for Syracuse was cut about $10,000. Yeah. . . it's been a stressful May. Which all culminated with me freaking out and having a panic attack. But I believe I'm coming out of my depression, because I'm acting so very manic as of late(with the exception of Friday night). I no things will get better, it just takes time, but I no everything will be alright.

Well I turned 18 on the 23 of May. . . that was a fun day. I also graduated High School on Thursday. Woo for me!

So I haven't been feeling art a lot lately. . . I haven't made art of my own since art IV and I think it's the reason I've been an emotional volcano in which my lovely Noah has been taking the full force of my molten crazy. So I've come to the conclusion that the boy is smarter than I give him credit for and that I should really listen to him when he gives me advice. Him being a musician, we have a similar love hate relationship with are passions. So he was telling me how I need to start practicing everyday regardless of whether I'd like to or not. So I'm going to try to practice every day until I can start coming up with artwork for me again. Then I'll be releasing my emotions in a constructive way like I use to instead of using poor Noah as my crutch. So I will hopefully have some artwork to upload sooner or later. But I have to say, I have still been doing photography as you've somewhat seem. Have some more from Friday that should be up eventually.